The funny side of techsupport

Well, here I was, thinking my job is just full of stress, anxiety and pressure. Not much room for laughing when someone's computer has crashed or the server decides that the raid controller card is now bad and shuts down all access to data and the internet (no DHCP server, no IP Addresses means no internet which means really cranky users not able to check their face book pages... oh the horror...)

Ahem... ok... moving on...

So, I'm remotely troubleshooting a computer in our China office (joy) and I ask for some details about the "new" laptop they just bought (and, coincidentally, are having the issue with).

Here is my email to the user with some "simple" questions with the responses below the question and then my initial reaction to the response is in Red.

This gets stranger and stranger... odd that you can now access and read emails but can't send anything out.

Since I'm in factories all day today, I can't poke around on your computer.

Can you let me know the following:

Question 1: What are the basic specs of your computer.

Response: See pic:

My initial reaction: WTF

Question 2: What version of Internet Explorer your computer is using?

Response: Windows 7
 
My initial reaction: WTF.... (insert belly laugh complete with snort here)

Question 3: What anti-virus software has been installed?

Response: China versin:360

My initial reaction: WTF.... hmm... aside from spelling error, this could be legit... must research
 
Question 4: Has there been any automatic downloaded updates from Microsoft recently?

Response: My computer is not original software,so will not update automatically

My initial reaction: WTF.... holy crap, are you  SERIOUS!!! I friken quit!!!